Some good rational thinking on this.

Some good rational thinking on this.

There’s no such thing as a soulmate—some divine intervention or special alignment of the planets with the moon and stars, that brings you together with another. Even if there is such a thing, it’s not like the relationship will just “work” as if by magic just because fate deemed you perfect for each other – that’s on YOU.

https://ifstudies.org/blog/moving-beyond-dreams-of-a-soulmate

Forgiveness is for the strong – we should not be afraid of it

Forgiveness is for the strong – we should not be afraid of it
 
If you are finding yourself constantly angry about things which are out of your control, it’s more important to first realize you are not responsible for anything but your own feelings about it.  Then you must forgive.  Even if you don’t say it to the person, tell them inside your head, you forgive it. Don’t forget to also forgive yourself, when you need to.
 
“I’m afraid to forgive because . . .”
 
It is understandable why we have a hard time being able to forgive. It makes us afraid. Afraid that forgiving means you’re letting someone off the hook or to get away with something. Afraid that you may have to change, or be perceived by others as weak or soft.  To live a loving and open life, this is the one fear you have to let go of.
 
Forgiveness isn’t weakness – forgiveness is more powerful and useful than holding in resentment and living in anger.  Don’t let anger hold you back and weigh you down from having happiness you deserve.

Anger is a big anxiety emotion and causes severe, constant stress, which can lead to several unwanted physical and…

Anger is a big anxiety emotion and causes severe, constant stress, which can lead to several unwanted physical and mental problems which can make it hard to enjoy a good quality of life.

While anger can be an anxiety symptom, it can also be a major cause. People struggling with anger issues frequently experience very deep anxiety worrying about their ability to control their anger, and in some people, this can lead to further outbursts of anger, which circles back around to create more stress.

Stoic philosophers believe that we can choose not to live in anger and choose a path to mindfulness instead. What is stoic mindfulness? Being in harmony with reason by suspending value judgments when they arise and viewing automatic impressions with greater psychological distance. This is achieved by grounding your awareness in your current surroundings (being “in the moment” or “the here and now”) and trying to view your experiences and situations from detached and objective points of view, rather than emotional perspectives.

Mindfulness exercise: take a step away from the situation, leave the room you are in. Go outside—ideally—into a natural environment, even if it’s just your back yard or the strip of lawn outside your office. Get deep breaths full of fresh air, visually take in all the nature around you, and smell the grass and/or plants. Become aware of your height/weight, the physical space you take up, and your location in the great, big world. Realize how small you are (and the matter is), in the grand scheme of the universe.

Now, think about what it was that made you so angry. Is it still important? Is not resolving it going to stop you from getting through the rest of your day? Is it something that’s going to stop you from you being personally happy? What about in a year from now?

Finally, is your anger rooted to something that doesn’t belong to you, or that you are not in charge of? Let it go. It’s not yours.