BJ Woods

Napping. It’s not just for kids and lazy people anymore.
The tradition of napping in other countries is supposedly dying out. It’s been proven be a healthful and refreshing and even life-extending benefit to notable folks like Winston Churchill, Thomas Edison, Napolean Bonaparte, Johannes Brahms, and Ronald Reagan, so why didn’t Americans ever emphasize the need for one? Is our society afraid of being called lazy? Just because we need a little break? You decide.

Same day, different year..

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Powell’s Israel Visit Brings About…Nothing, Dampening ExpectationsAs the Israeli military continued its offensive, Israel was on high alert for suicide bombers and the secretary of

state said a formal truce was unlikely before he left.

Same day, different year..

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UGh. It took me over twenty minutes to post this day’s entries. Blogger publishing seems to be slow, or down. I checked status.blogger.com and there’s nothing there to tell me any different, and also status.blogspot.com, and no news there, which leaves me to use the Adminimizer toolbar from ASP Modules. If you don’t have it yet, GET IT. It’s easy to install, and although mine leaves my date header looking kinda funny (it lines up weirdly), I do find it comes in handy when you really need to post something and Blogger is for shit. Oh well, on with already:

‘Virtual’ Child Pornography Ban Overturned
The Supreme Court struck down provisions of a federal law that made it a crime to create, distribute or possess “virtual” child pornography. Apparently there are some real losers out there who do computer-generated lifelike fake kiddie porn and it’s considered NOT to be porn by the Supreme Court because it’s ‘virtual’. I’m sorry, but real or pretend, you’re ALL SICK! What do you think? Everyone knows that child pornography communities thrive and hideout in online places, like MSN communities, but I think there should be stiffer regulations on how communities are built, and those who monitor them should be more on the lookout for this kind of behavior.

Same day, different year..

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Friends, I’ve long wanted to be able to provide useful advice to the young people today, with regards to their ever-fruitful social lives, to help guide them along whatever paths in life they choose. I’ve got some solutions for most red-blooded men and women. If you posess at least half a brain, you qualify as needing this pertinent information.

Do not hesitate to start with our guides on: ‘Dating In the New Millenium’ (for both genders), and for the ladies, ‘A Good Old Fashioned Fuck’.

Please stay tuned to this station for updates and valuable tools to help you. Whether it’s love, dating, or friendship issues you’ve got, I’d like to be your solution.

Same day, different year..

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Why Do Porn Actors Have To Use Such Foul Language?

Maggie Lehman, a fine source of editorial commentary over at The Onion, once again proves herself correct. She points out “Like many people, I enjoy pornographic movies.” but she’s got an issue with bad language. “Thankfully, my husband Marv fast-forwards through the plot so we don’t have to hear any more vulgarity than is absolutely necessary.” Good for you Maggie, good for you.

Same day, different year..

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Ooh, ooh! I also forgot to tell you–Uffish Thoughts is where I found a link to Mr. T doing his neato butter booby trick. Yay! What a treasure…and I thought I’d seen every bit of his work!

If you idolize Mr. T like I do, then you ought to get yourself acquainted with all his ultra-super celebrity appearances articles on the web. I’m sure you can find some of them to be of utmost importance, if not pretty valuable:

The Mr. T. Name Generator – Don’t like your name, fool? Get a betta one!

The T’inator – Turn any web page into a helluva fine site that Mr. T published it (those who don’t approve of Mr. T’s genuine, loveable charm would use the word ‘invaded’ instead of published)

How To Hide The Fact That You’re Mr. T. From Your Co-Workers – Who’d want to hide that jibba jabba?

Same day, different year..

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Gosh, I guess I’m a little bit more chipper tonight than I was earlier.

I’m sure it took a couple hours for me to thaw out. You didn’t wanna mess with me earlier. I did skip out on the PT temp job today…but even though I took the day off I found it was very hard to relax. After I went back out this morning around 11:30 I got very wet and cold and couldn’t get it out of my system until after dinner tonite. I went out to another temp agency (I should be the temp agency poster child, for chrissakes) and did all their friggin’ paper work, testing and whatnot and then missed my bus.

So all day, I was nasty to anyone who got in my way. It’s kinda weird how little things can change your mood for the rest of the day. Good thing I’m feeling better now. Anyway, this possible FT position I’m checking into at the agency I went to today, is for some admin assistant work, at a college near downtown Minneapolis and I’m far too excited. I know I need to squelch that because I’ve been there and done that before, only to be let down. Shit hurts I guess. Gotta pick my ass up, brush it off and start anew. Whatever.

Even though it’s late, I am nowhere near tired and would like to skip out on job du jour tomorrow but that ain’t happenin’ (I hate temping!), so I’m gonna hafta get myself ready for bed and face the music.

I just have a lot of crap on my plate right now. Yummy.

I can’t wait for dessert, dammit.

Same day, different year..

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• Weird Searches of the Week – 2005

You make EVERrrr-thaang

grooooovvvvy

Where did that come from?

*looks around the room*

My life sucks. I need a new one.

Maybe these guys will buy it for me.

Anybody got any offers?
I’ve already checked the junk mail and the classifieds.

I think I just need somebody to love.

*gasp*
Oh NO. did I say that? wtf is wrong with me?

Tune in tomorrow for the next exciting episode, my heart will be guest-starring.

PS: this is utterly, repugnantly, repulsive

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On my Winamp playlist right now:

Etta James – At Last Doris Troy – Just One Look Jimmy Soul – If You Wanna Be Happy Positive K – I Got A Man Sixpence None The Richer (Here On Earth – Soundtrack) – I Need Love

Gladys Knight & The Pipps – Heard It Through The Grapevine

Ahhh…good to be home. Worked 4 hours at job numero dos today. Then I went and dontated plasma and ran some errands and bumped into an old friend along the way. Finally on my way home, I picked up some Chinese takeout.

I AM online. Do something different. E-mail me.

I love to talk to people

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Go, Go, Go to http://www.davidgagne.net Read all about it. I luv it, I luv it, I luv it. want to spread it on a cracker. just like I told him so.

Home for the holiday. Yippee! Oh, but wait. I gotta upgrade my IE to 5.5. God forbid I crash something or my java doesn’t work JUST RIGHT, while on this oh Holy happy one-day hiatus (yes, I have to work Friday, Saturday AND Sunday). I’m hoping to spread myself really thin and have to end up at Workaholics Anonymous meetings, drinking Perrier with a twist and chainsmoking while rubbing elbows with uppitty paralegals slash Girl Scout leaders slash PTA chairs slash soccer moms (and OK, dads too) who engage in brow-beating their kids to overachieve but then they’re at the office 18 hours a day, and have to spend Saturday nights cheating on their spouses and need to be on the golf course on Sunday by noon.

I can’t believe what I’m faced with when I’m done downloading the upgrade and ready to install. It says there is more downloading to do. So I click ‘Next’ and here is what I get:

So then what do I get when I go to look for tech support? Bill’s gay-ass “Oh, hi, I put my pants on one leg at a time, too you know” page. Fuck it.

Going to mom’s house now, for the festivities. Hoo. Rah.

Katie, Matt & Willard are going to be way too perky for me, bright and early tomorrow, ’cause I plan on being hung over with a capital ‘H’….it’s just been THAT kind of week. Week? Ha. It’s not even over yet.

Speaking of drinks…I was trying to find the best place for cocktail and beverage recipes is and when I clicked on this link, this is what I got (screenshot below).

All I could say was whoa, that’s a big fuckin’ search bar, mate.

Well that’s all the fun I could stand! I’m out, for now anyway…

nitey-nite

Same day, different year..

Other posts on this day:

• So gosh darn glad it’s Monday…NOT – 1999