BJ Woods

Been working alot, 12 hour days sometimes. You’ll get over it…

The other day I was taking the Minneapolis bus home from work and this scruffy lookin’ (for lack of a better description) guy was sitting next to me, listening to his walkman, as was I. I couldn’t help but notice that he was really getting INTO whatever song he was listening to, and after a moment or two, I had weird hunch that he and I were listening to the same station. Gun’s N’ Roses’ “Sweet Child O’ Mine” was playing on my radio and I was kinda tappin’ my thumbs on my bookbag. He caught a glance at me, and he was kind of in synch to my tapping rhythm. He was doing that lame-ass air guitar thing with his hands and nodding his head. For a second, we both looked at each other and kind of both nodded our heads along in synch to our music.

The song got done playing on my radio. So I elbow the dude lightly, in his ribs after it was done. He moved his earpiece and looks at me. I said “GNR, eh?”, to which he replied, “naw…Thin Lizzy, man, they rock!”. So I was like okay, hmmm, whatever. This dude is weird. Not that there’s anything wrong with Thin Lizzy, it was the dude. He had this uncanny Tommy Chong quality that was eerie and sort of gross, which I didn’t really notice at first. I blew him off and went back to looking out my window. After a minute, he stole a glance my way, so I turned abrubtly, on purpose, to see just what the fuck he was lookin’ at. He had this shit-eating grin on his face, like he was flirting with me and I was supposed to be charmed. Whatever!

I gave him a look that told him to piss off and we all went back to our silly anti-social ride, back to ignoring each other like everyone else does, the way you’re SUPPOSED to behave on the bus.

Okay well I’ve got to work again in the morning, at nine. We get free bagels and coffee on Saturdays, yippee! At least SOMEONE feeds me…my cuboard is BARE )o:

Nitey nite…

Same day, different year..

Other posts on this day:

MONDAY

8:00 Husseinfeld

8:30 Mad About Everything

9:00 Suddenly Sanctions

9:30 Allah McBeal

TUESDAY

8:00 Wheel of Fortune and Terror

8:30 The Price is Right if Saddam Says it’s Right

9:00 Children Are Forbidden to Say The Darndest Things

9:30 Iraq’s Funniest Public Execution Bloopers

WEDNESDAY

8:00 Buffy The Yankee Imperialist Dog Slayer

8:30 Diagnosis: Heresy

9:00 Just Shoot Me

9:30 Veilwatch

THURSDAY

8:00 Mahatma Loves Chachi

8:30 M*U*S*T*A*S*H

9:00 Veronica’s Closet Full of Long, Black, Shapeless Dresses

9:30 My Two Baghdads

FRIDAY

8:00 Judge Saddam

8:30 Captured Iranian Soldiers Say The Darndest Things

9:00 Achmed’s Creek

9:30 No Witness News

Other posts on this day:

• Top 20 ways to tell someone their fly is unzipped – 2000

Why do I even bother to shower when I get stuck two days in a row working in the basement doing package receiving? my nails are filthy and my skin feels nasty, that gritty feel you get from working in a dirty basement. not like the dirty you get from gardening or yard work. that’s just soil. this is gritty, crappy, dusty, grime from boxes being knocked around on numerous dirty truck floors and mailrooms and then to me. Ick.

Today I woke up just a few minutes late and didn’t want to get out of bed.  So I went and sat on the couch w/my favorite fleece blanket, got some coffee and watched some t.v. before I had to get dressed and go.  These goofballs on the early morning news shows must really have no idea how silly they are. I especially like this weather guy, him with his goofy sound effects and crusty old stupid one liners.  He practically needs a hi-hat & drum to go ”ba-dum bum!” after his own punch lines. What a dork.

This weekend was a crock. I didn’t do too much on Friday and Saturday except get some errands done. If I could do it again, I’d have spent more time on the couch w/my blanket and the Cartoon Network.

On Sunday I went shopping with my mom, which was pleasant enough, and then later I went to my folks’ house so I could get her to check over my tax forms and in return I would help her w/her computer. she has access to the web now and needs me to install the browsers for her system but I told her that before she does any of that she has got to get a memory upgrade, back up her HD and then compress it so she can get the most out of the web. the memory on that sucker is very low anyway so I can’t see her enjoying any of it if her pc crashes while she is trying to look at a web page or do her banking online.

Damn, get me OUT of this office….phew. the smell is near unbearable, plus it’s so nasty down here cause that dirty dust gets into your lungs and you feel like hawking up a hella loogie.  Or is it loogy? how the hell do you spell that word, anyway?

Why is it that some people who display their art or literature on the www or are big tech heads are such snobs about how they work their site or their craft?? what is THAT all about? I understand that there are certain elements of design that should be followed to the ‘T’ if you are trying to draw lots of visitors to your site or if the main point of the site is to be aesthetically pleasing but come ON already. that’s all I had to say on that topic, I just had to get it off my chest.

Three things I know for a fact:

1) Diet Dr. Pepper *does* taste just like regular

2) Upright Citizens Brigade is fabulous television

3) Ally McBeal is not.

Okay, I gotta go, I just found out that the smell I’ve been smelling is probably spilled antifreeze down here so I need to go get some air and get ready to go home.

#@$shot planet
Um. I almost had no comment for this one but I’m tempted to guess whether this is a new restaurant or something? *sports confused look*

O.K. The next one has got to be THE contender for the top weirdest search result that leads to this site:

Shatner and Who Let the Dogs Out
makes me wonder just what this person was really looking for. Did they suppose that Cap’n Kirk was going to be trying on a more ‘hip’ song for his lame-ass Priceline spokesperson spots? Or were they just too lazy to do two separate searches for each? Plus, who would really CARE to read anything about either topic?! It just shows you that there’s no accounting for taste.

Speaking of indigestion…
Every once in a while, I get some really strange e-mails in my inbox, but this one takes the cake. Not only has someone apparently has mistaken me for someone called Tia, WRONG! …but he or she thinks I’ve got some sort of hankering for transsexuals/hermaphrodites/whatever you want to call this THING., to boot.

LEGO RAVE!
your parents DON’T put it together for you. Link courtesy of slimgirl, who rocks, hard. Hooks me up with free stuff, too. Go visit her page and bask in its glory. Don’t get too comfy with the design, however…she likes to switch it up. Alot. Go Susie!

Same day, different year..

Other posts on this day:

• Pooh pooh on Worky Jerky – 2005

…and getting caught in dusty apartments with rock bands  

Last night I had a very strange dream. I was sitting in a cramped, slightly run down second floor apartment somewhere and was having a conversation with Matchbox 20’s Rob Thomas. Weird. turns out it was his place. Who knows when THIS was, I’m sure, some kind of joke. I really could not imagine this. I was hanging around and the band was hanging around and could see me and we were having some discussion. This particular nite I had been asked to come over and so I did. One of the band members had come over later than the rest and he was really bummy looking. I could not identify him, for some reason his likeness was blurry. He had asked Rob if he knew where the fuck his case of Corona went, ’cause apparently he had left it there previously. no one said anything. Then I woke up.

Care to analyze that one ???

By the way, since I didn’t know what the hell I was doing, I accidentally deleted my entry for Monday, so I located it in the archives. Unfortunately, this throws off my archives flow. Oh well. Thanks for being human and understanding.

Same day, different year..

Other posts on this day:

Have dinner, I suppose!

Boy, being on The Food Shelf Diet is Mmm-mmm good! Mushy mac & cheese. Tonight I learned you should never overcook macaroni noodles. What a way to top off a non-eventful, ho-hum weekend. I’m sitting here searching the web for PT work for the millionth time. I need to make more money ’cause I’m debt. who isn’t?

Just got done listening to Pink Floyd’s “Wish You Were Here” and was thinking alot about life…

In addition to PT work, I am also changing full time jobs. I had two interviews while I was on vacation but that’s not enough. I need to go on more and hopefully land something, and soon.

I told the people at my job about my decision to find something that’s a ‘better fit’ and I all but gave them my leave notice. Luckily, they took it well and they’re even cool with me taking time off for interviews, if I need it.

Strange. I was taking a big risk in doing that. Most places might say ‘okay then, see ya around’ and then give ya the pink slip.  I guess I should be glad but I’m not ’cause now I am still working there but everyone knows it is a joke that I do, ’cause I don’t wanna be there.

I think I’m addicted to SuperMario3 because I find myself playing it on my NES emulator at least every other night. I also have some cute little Mario figurines sitting atop my monitor, that I salvaged from my parent’s basement, before they had the garage sale this summer.

My nephew thinks he’s the shit, now that he’s in kindergarten. It’s all I ever hear about. School this, school that. Well, good for him. I never liked school. Hopefully he’ll keep that attitude up for another 12 years. He’s gonna be a Mighty Morphin Power Ranger for halloween. Ten bucks for cheap fabric and a flimsy plastic mask. Could make that at home for about $4.00. Sheesh.

Other than all that, not much newsworthy going on around here. Back to the job search.

Same day, different year..

Other posts on this day:

• Everything is Dunky Hory. – 2003

Back off of vacation but feeling a bit windblown and blistered, not to mention anxious and weary at the same time. It’s late so I know I need to go to bed but I am not all that tired. Let’s see if I can post this dang thing correctly.  Manila weblogs.com has gotten me a bit cornfused. 

I’ve finally gotten all this xml and homepage flipping down pat.  Sheesh.  The things you have to learn just to be able to post your thoughts nowadays. Haha.

Well it’s even later now than it was before and I really really really have to go to bed soon. Have another job interview tomorrow (damn…today), at a printing place in Minneapolis. Will blab incessently about it later.

Niteynite

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Today I made $20.00 without barely batting an eyelash.

I owed someone $10.00 from this weekend and had no cash on me, so last night I went to the mini mart on my walk home from the bus to get some cash out of the ATM. I forgot to get change for the bus the next morning so today as I am leaving, I go to see if Bill (my neighbor) could break my ten spot for me. 

No sir. 

I decide to just start walking and perhaps go up to the gas station and try there, even though it was more than a few blocks out of my way, I was just going to have to be late today.  On the other hand, I could just risk it and hop on the bus hoping someone has change.  Drivers never make change, and usually when people get on the bus and ask other passengers for change people all act like they’re asleep or deaf.

As I am leaving the building, I hear some movement in one of the first floor apartments. I don’t hesitate to knock on the door (yes, it’s 7 a.m., but they are up, aren’t they?)

A young man sporting a wet head and a towel around his waist answers the door, and although he barely looks awake, I ask him if he has change for a $10.

“No, but if you gimme a sec, I’ll check around, my roommate might.”
door shuts.

I stand and wait, tapping my foot. “The bus is coming, the bus is coming,” I think over and over in my head.

Should I wait?
…or should I bolt, ’cause he probably won’t have the change anyway??

Naw. Stay here.

can’t hurt.

I hear him waking his poor roomate, Greg or something like that.

I wait some more. Door opens. sleepy young man looks at me and says “No change here, how much you need?”

“No, that’s alright, nevermind…” says I.

“No, really, it’s no big deal, how much?” So I think about it for a second and then I tell him it’s two bucks for the bus.

“O.K. Stay right there, I’ll be right back.” says he. wait some more.

fidget.

Once again breifly contemplate dashing out the door. It’s right THERE.”bus is coming….”
door opens. sleepy wet head hands me two bills and four quarters, which I shove into my pocket and then I silently thank my lucky stars ’cause now I’ll only be a few minutes late as opposed to my earlier expectations, and then I gush at him, “Thanks alot man, I really appreciate it, I live up in 6E and when I get home tonight I’ll pay you back and…”

He cuts me off to say that it’s not a problem, he’s been there before and then he wishes me a good day.

I return the pleasantry and all but run out the door, down the street, and two blocks to the bus stop, just in time for the early one.

I thank goodness for good neighbors and then I get on the bus and bitch under my breath how hot the bus is because of the fact that the driver has the radiator at about 95 degrees again today. I put one of the dollar bills and two quarters into the bus meter and get to work just in time.

I later notice that the other bill the guy handed me is a twenty.

Now, being that I’m flat broke right now, I could’ve been a dirty little brat and kept that money. it is still sitting on my dining room table right now but I had been downstairs knocking on their door at almost hourly intervals since I got home tonight, so I could give it back to the guy and yeah, I’m an honest person.

I wake up at about ten today to find that my body aches and my head hurts. I was good all week! what did I do to deserve such pain? and on a Saturday!!!??  Such an unkind reward, since I’m always looking forward to this day of the week. After some breakfast and coffee I feel somewhat better. ran some errands, got the mail, had lunch and now here I am, kind of pondering what to tackle first, of the many things on my ‘to do’ list.

Whatever happened to music on MTV? Today I actually sat and watched an hour of it (’course you know that on an hour show, for every seven or eight minutes of content there is a ten minute commercial break) but I saw that there was like, almost no music or references to it and I find that’s the most annoying. I also see that most of the content is geared to those aged 20+ but yet the audience participants and groupies and whatnot are all between 13 and 19.

Go figure.

Well, hey, this is kinda short, I know but I have LOTS to do and I promise to be back later.  Buh-bye for now

ohmygosh how right that is:
“Success always occurs in private, and failure in full view.”

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Bad Toys?
a National News article at NYPOST.COM talks about a Brooklyn NYC cop and local congressman who are urging parents to boycott stores who sell toys that they deem to be too violent.

In related news, last night I saw that Fox News had broadcasted a consumer report about violent toys this Christmas, wherein they mentioned that The Lion & Lamb Project has put together a “dirty dozen list” of toys that they see as violent “entertainment” products. This is part of their mission to stop the merchandising of violence to children.

The Lion & Lamb have a reputation for preaching anti-violence and are famous for having had youth bring violent toys together and burn them as a sign of some sort. Isn’t burning stuff kinda violent? Makes me think back to book-burning (does that still go on somewhere in Bible-belt America?) Their slogan this year? “Violence is not child’s play”. Indeed it is not. However, haven’t violent toys and violent ‘pretend’ play been a part of American children’s lives since the beginning of time? My young newphew, now 7 was a four-year old playing with kids 6 and up, and would find a ‘weapon’ in every inanimate object including forks at the dinner table, Lego pieces, loose tree branches outside in the yard. His parents and adult relatives (myself, his grandma), would encourage him to play in an otherwise less objectionable manner by playing games with him. Tiddlywinks, Memory, Chutes & Ladders, riding bikes together, baseball, etc., and found ourselves exhausted because all that we did was unsuccessful and we just shrugged it off as ‘kids will be kids’ and do what they want. My sister and I did the same sorts of things during play. My mother and her brother had cap guns and fake weapons they used when playing ‘cowboys and indians’ back in the 50’s and I’m sure most other parents and kids could agree that what kids play with nowadays isn’t much different.

What do you think? Post your responses in the squawk box.

Same day, different year..

Other posts on this day:

• Partially Unemployed, Day 1 – 2000